Pet Peeves (I hate it when....)

I was driving home today and came to a 4 way stop... and a man did something that made me cringe.. and I thought to myself, "Ooooh I hate it when people do that"

My friend, Lakethia, recently blogged about her favorite things(http://www.motherhoodtyfamnty.blogspot.com/)... unfortunately, I'm doing the opposite.

I hate it when... you come to a 4 way stop and clearly have the right of way and someone waves you to go as if they are doing you a favor!

I hate it when... you go to Panda Express and have to order in Spanish.

I hate it when... someone does something nice for you and suggests you repay with something way more expensive and elaborate. Example, my friend bought me a bottle of water and said I can repay her with a round of drinks in Vegas. I slapped down a dollar and paid for my own water.

I hate it when... you ask a simple question and get a long winded answer!

I hate it when... you get behind someone with WIC coupons at the grocery store.

I hate it when... you see a welfare recipient in a better car than yours rollin on mo-mo's.

I hate it when... your baby daddy's girlfriend tries to be your friend.

I hate it when... people think it's cute when their baby visits your table at a restaurant. Go sit down, Junior!!!

I hate it when... you get reprimanded for being a few minutes late to work and NEVER get praised for being a few minutes early. WTF?

I hate it when... someone asks what nationality you are and then tells you what they thought you were. Then why did you ask, asshole?

I hate it when... you go in for a pedicure and they start suggesting you need something else. "Ohh, you want wax?".... "No"... "Ohhh, you should get wax"... There goes your tip, Phuc.

I hate it when... you have to guess what pastries they have at a Starbucks drive thru window. List that shit!!!

I hate it when... the dumb clerk at the store give you more change that what you're supposed to get and your conscience kicks in. Dammit!

I hate it when... people pronounce the H in Rihanna.

I hate it when... my kids have to look at the McDonalds menu like something has changed. Same shit, just order.

I hate it when... someone calls you at 1 AM and has the nerve to ask you, "Oh were you sleeping?" What the hell?!?

I hate it when... you get re-gifted.

I hate it when... people don't use spell check.

But I do love it when people read my blogs and get a little giggle from it. Thanks for visiting everyone!!

The Melting Pot

Hey Guys - It's finally here at The San Mateo Melting Pot.....our first Sierra Nevada Beer Dinner on June 16th. We will have a great 3 course dinner paired with a Porter, Summerfest and Torpedo Ale. Afterwards, we will head out on the patio for an after dinner drink and a nice cigar.

The price is $59 per person and will be held on every 3rd Tuesday of the month.

It's wine dinner time. We will have our 1st world wine dinner on June 25th. We will feature 3 courses paired with 3 wines from Europe and an after dinner Port for $59 per person. We will continue to have one wine dinner each month on the 4th Thursday of each month.

Please call for the special Father's Day Menu at The San Mateo Melting Pot at 650-342-6358 to reserve your table.

Scramblz Diner

For all of you with kids.... this is the diner for you- Scramblz Diner in Morgan Hill.

The atmosphere is 50's Diner style.... they have all the toys from when we were little hanging above you or on the wall. The decor is fun for the kids to look at... keeps them busy till the food comes.

The food is very comparable to Denny's... casual restaurant, great portions, and reasonably priced... but Scramblz just hung a sign outside saying KIDS EAT FREE AFTER 3 PM EVERYDAY!

Everyday?? Everyday!!! Not just on Tuesdays?? No Everyday!!!

So if you're a family on a budget this is the place for you... and if your kid asks, "Can Robbie come too?" All you have to say is, "How old is he?"... "10".... "OF COURSE Robbie can come!!!"

Not only are you taking them some place fun to eat... you're looking like a cool parent as well... I rate this as a WW (win/win).

Visit Scrambl'z
775 E. Dunne Ave.
Morgan Hill
Just off the 101 & E. Dunne Ave.

Rollin with my Catheter

So I closed down the "chocolate factory" in December 2008... for those of you that don't know what the "chocolate factory" is... it's Me. I make the cutest chocolate drops (babies)... They first come out looking like white chocolate and as they get older, they start to look more cocoa.

Well I had my tubes tied... actually I had a semi-new procedure done called the Essure. It's where they laparoscopically enter the uterus and spring some coil into each fallopian tube. Boom, bam and you're done... I was under for about 45 min. (However, they are learning how to do this with a local anesthesia) After they spring the coils in you have to wait 3 months and then go back and have an ultrasound to make sure everything closed up and you're good to go...

Well I missed my 3 month follow up appt so they rescheduled me for today. My doctor works out of 2 offices... so here is what I have to do... I have to see him at one office where he will insert a catheter... I then have to hop off his table (with the catheter in), waddle to my car (with the catheter in), drive 30 min to his other office (with the cather in) to have the ultrasound done. So I asked him how am I supposed to be mobile with this thing hanging out of my goodies... he said he was going to put surgical tape there to hold it in place. (Oh Man, I wish I would have shaved today!!!!)

So wish me luck, blogging peeps!!! I have a feeling I'm in for an adventure today!!!!

Get to know me......

What time did you get up this morning? 5:30 AM
Diamonds or pearls? Diamonds
What was the last film you saw at the cinema? Earth
What is your favorite TV show? The Hills (I know... so sue me!)
What do you usually have for breakfast? Toothpaste
What is your middle name? Patrice
What food do you dislike? Brussel Sprouts!!!
What is your favorite CD at the moment? Sheeesh! Haven't we evolved to iTunes??
What kind of car do you drive? A Hooptie 5000 Limited Edition
Favorite sandwich? Turkey/Avacado
What characteristic do you despise? Oh I can't stand Cruella De Vil.... oh characteristic... Ummm... Stupidity
Favorite item of clothing? Period Panties aka Granny Panties
If you could go anywhere in the world on vacation, where would you go? Intercourse, Al... no joke it's an actual city...
Favorite brand of clothing? Goodwill Couture
Where would you retire to? Intercourse, Al
What was your most recent memorable birthday? 30th... I'll blog about that one day.
Favorite sport to watch? The Center for the Blind Water Polo Games
Farthermost place you are sending this? Intercourse, Al
When is your birthday? Everyday!!!!
Any new and exciting news you'd like to share with us? I love to BLOG!!!
What did you want to be when you were little? A whale trainer
How are you today? Super sleepy... see question 1
What is your favorite candy? The one that you can eat a lot of, tastes great and won't gain weight!!! Let me know when it's invented!!!
What is a day on the calendar you are looking forward to? P-p-p-payday!!!!
What are you listening to right now? A coworker that has a mean twang... I think she's from Intercourse, Al.... I wish she would shut up!!!
What was the last thing you ate? A booger... no tissue available...
If you were a crayon, what color would you be? Pewter
How is the weather right now? Too nice to be at work
The first person you spoke to on the phone today? My friendly neighborhood bill collector
Favorite restaurant? It's now Gordon Biersch... garlic fries and hard lemonades will have you smelling like a indian hobo the next day!!!
Real hair color? Hold on... let me check the bush...
What was your favorite toy as a child? BIG WHEEL!!!!
What is under your bed? Scary monsters!!!!
What are you afraid of ? Sharks, herpes, clowns and long toenails... in no particular order.
Salty or sweet? Hmmmm, what are we talking about??




Happy Wednesday everybody!!! 2 more days till Friday!!!!

Hip Hop Craze Show

Hip Hop Craze Annual Fundraiser Show!!!

Don't miss it!!!

Friday, May 29th @ Sobrato High School in Morgan Hill. Show starts at 7 pm.

The Bay Area's Best Hip Hop Dance Crew will be putting on a show for everyone. Tickets are just $10!!!

Hip Hop Craze has performed on or with:

BET's 106th & Park

Too Short

Supreme Soul

Bay Area BARS Awards

and more....

Get your tickets today!!

I love Hot Cheetos??

So my mini me, Jayden, has been asking me for hot cheetos for over a week now. I guess she overheard someone talking about hot cheetos or maybe she saw someone eating them, I don't know.... but every time we pass a convenience store or go to the grocery store, she's yelling out for hot cheetos. I keep telling her that she's not gonna like hot cheetos but her rebuttle is "yah-huh". I guess that means she will. Well I didn't give in to buying them until today. We had to run into 7-11 and there she goes, asking for hot cheetos. Once again I told her that she's not gonna like them to pick something else... but she insisted that she LOVES hot cheetos and really wanted them. So I let her pick out a bag of hot cheetos... while she was doing that, I walked over to the slurpee machine because I knew that was going to come in handy too.

We get to the car and before I could buckle her in, she's shoving the bag in my face saying "Open this for me, Mommy"... I got in and then opened the bag for her... she thrust her little chubby hand in the bag and pulled out a long, fire engine red hot cheetos. She looked at it for a second and thrust it in her mouth... I was watching her in my rear view mirror... she coughed, cleared her throat and shoved another in her mouth. Coughed again, cleared her throat a couple of times and now her eyes are starting to water... put another hot cheetos in her mouth, coughed, cleared, eyes watering and nose running... I couldn't help but giggle... this went on for a few minutes... about 7 cheetos in, I knew she had just had it. She looked a mess! I thought I was going to have to pull over and put her mouth in front of a fire hydrant. She caught me looking at her and as stubborn as she is, she wasn't going to prove me right. Instead, she yells "Deeeeee-LISH-ous!!! I'm going to save some for NayNay." And she rolled up the top of the bag and handed them to me... without saying a word to her, I handed her the slurpee... I don't know what went faster, the redness from her eyes or the slurpee...

She hasn't asked for the remaining hot cheetos.... and I don't think she will.... but her and I both know that I was right.

These words....

My 2 year old.... God love her.... tries her best to pronounce words. They come out just wrong but they are so cute!

She loves ice cream. It's her favorite dessert... but when she's really excited, it comes out like this, "Mommy! After I eat all my food, can I get some ass cream?" So I'll ask her is she sure she would like some "ass" cream... she nods her head excitedly and repeats it. "Yes Mommy, I want chocolate ass cream!!!" I think it just sounds funnier because she really doesn't realize she's saying it wrong... and I'm a horrible mom not to correct her. :)

Tonight at dinner she kept telling me that she's done with her "specialables" (vegetables). Although she can name each and every vegetable correctly, she can't pronounce the word that puts them all together. So I asked her to eat just a few of her "specialables" because that would make her a "special" girl. She agreed.

These type of things that make me love being a mom and love having such wonderful children with unique personalities.

Well she just bit her tongue jumping up and down trying dance, so I guess that means this blog is over.... for now.

Walk of Shames

We've all done it... don't deny it.... Everyone has had their own versions of the "walk of shame".

Well I've done a little research and here are the top 5 walk of shames....

#5 Drunken Walk of Shame- When you have to face your friends after being so drunk you don’t remember what you did or who you did it with, but all you know is that you smell like vomit and everyone is shaking their heads.

#4 Dressing Room Walk of Shame- When you have to walk back out of the dressing room to get a bigger size because you could have SWORN you were a size 5.

#3 Job Walk of Shame- When you're escorted off the premises when you've been fired from a job because they're afraid you'll go off.

#2 Roller Coaster Walk of Shame- Occurs at amusement parks when a guest doesn't fit on a ride and they are asked to get off.

#1 the classic Poo Poo Walk of Shame- When you take a big crap in a public restroom, and you forget to give other patrons a courtesy flush, and it stinks up the whole restroom/The trip from the stall to the sink, then out to the hall after taking a monster dump.

Happy Hump Day!

Hypochondriac

I haven't blogged in a few days... this has been a crazy week for me. Here's a little info about me... I work in a clinic. I have been working in the healthcare industry for over 12 years. Why? It pays the bills... because if it didn't, I'd be GONE!!! I'm am the biggest hypochondriac known to man. You have a cold.... I can instantly feel a fever coming on. You have the flu.... I got a stomach ache. A friend of mine called me and told me her daughter had mono.... my throat instantly closed up. I went and got checked because a friend of mine told me she knew someone who had an STD. Whatever it is, I immediately get the symptoms. I have no idea why I haven't been fired yet.

So it's all over the media.... Swine Flu... aka H1N1.... aka what the hell and how can I avoid it? I was out of work for two days (due to something else) but when I get back to work, I had a swarm of emails talking about the swine flu... the more I read... the more symptoms I developed. By the time I had cleared out my Inbox, I was unable to breathe and I was on my way to get my 2 year old out of daycare. I didn't go back to work that day.... But when I did go back, the parking lot was full. I knew exactly what that was from... people were here because they had symptoms or thought they had symptoms... so I entered the building from the back. I passed by 2 patients on my way to the entrance and wondered if they noticed I held my breath until I was about 20 ft away. I almost passed out!!!

My boss made an announcement that we are being given "special face masks" to wear should we come in contact with a patient with a positive result. I put that thing on right away!! I don't even work with the direct public but I didn't care. I honestly wanted a mask that went over my whole head and pumped in oxygen. I don't care if I sounded like Darth Vader!!! Give it to me!!! Sure enough I started getting symptoms by Friday. I knew it was all in my head but I sat at my desk all day on Friday with my mask on and the only time I would take it off was to take my temperature. I know everyone that passed my cubicle thought I was all the way crazy!

Now I'm contemplating calling in crazy on Monday to work... I don't think I will be able to keep a sane mind! I am the person that puts 4-5 seat covers on the toilet... I am the person that flushes the toilet with my foot... I am the person that washes her hands, opens the bathroom door with a paper towel AND uses the antibacterial gel.... I am a Hypochondriac!

Please comment this blog and tell me how you handle it?? =o)